Coronavirus- Are you projecting?

by | Mar 23, 2020 | Blog

A perspective on the Coronavirus panic that you may not have thought of…

Human beings have 6 primary survival needs. I don’t want to make this post a freakin’ novel so I’ll just reference the first 2 quickly –

‘Certainty’ and ‘Uncertainty’.

We have a base need for a Certainty because there has to be a minimum amount of safety for us to function outside of fight/flight. E.g. I would have to be certain that my house isn’t going to fall down in order to focus on writing this facebook post. If the base safety requirement isn’t established, we can’t do anything until it is.

But our second survival need is Uncertainty – and that’s the variety that counter-balances all that certainty.
Safety and routine are lovely.. but after a while you do get bored if there’s no adventure, no chaos, nothing to excite you.

For many people… their life situation has required a rebellion of apocalyptic proportions for some time.
I know because I have met them, coached them, and I have BEEN them.

In 2016, I hit a wall with my entire life, and the only way out was to bin the whole thing.
I was so unhappy with my job, my relationship, my sense of self… that I was unable to get out of bed at least 2days a week and I had started growing tumors.
I sold my houses and all my belongings, quit my 10yr corporate career, ended my long-term relationship and left the country with no return ticket.

Pretty drastic, huh…

To be fair, it did fix the problem.. 🤣

I speak to a lot of people regularly who hate their job, are unhappy in their relationship and who simply aren’t living all their dreams.
They are due a set of decisions that will have apocalyptic consequences for everything they currently know as ‘normal’ and ‘safe’.

But they’re not ready to make those changes.

Does that delete the need for Uncertainty? No. Survival Needs are not a choice – the CNS will meet them in any way it can. Ignoring your truth creates anxiety, not safety.

But if you’re not prepared to go utterly ‘Do or Die’ on your life (because it is Do or Die – you are going to die, potentially with your dreams unlived…) then what do you do with that intense need for drama and excitement? What do you do to distract yourself from the awfulness of knowing what you need to do and being too scared to do it?

You project.

You panic about other sh1t.

You go apocalyptic on anything that’ll take you.

You pretend that things that aren’t actually affecting you right now are a legitimate threat to your life and you act out all your unacknowledged ability to move on them.

Do you have a lot of toilet paper in your house right now but you phucking hate your job?

Are you stocked up on canned goods but you can’t tell your partner about your dreams and expect them to join you on your journey?

Have you secretly loved the chaotic bonding over the panic of the coronavirus because it was the first time your social circle was as amped about something as you are?

Did the intense adventure of finally finding disinfectant at a little-known supermarket give you an Indiana-Jones like hit of success that you haven’t felt at work in about 10yrs?


Tell me what you think in the comments..